wake up at 5 a.m.
scurry off to the gym
do some seriously intense cardio
limp over to the machines to do a leg workout
kill my legs.. seriously.. they are jello-fied
sit there trying to recover
see a very very buffed man walking towards me
see this man decide to stretch directly (and a little too close) in front of me
see this man do the splits. not side splits. MIDDLE SPLITS
scratch my head trying to understand how in the hizzeck he is managing this
realize it's way too early to see this kind of stuff
decide to hobble home before I see any other acts of sweaty contortion-ism
shower and try to wash my eyes with soap.